A glam trans woman has hit back at trolls who say it’s “assault” not to reveal she’s transgender to men hitting on her on nights out — and says “they don’t deserve to know”.
Tayla Dow was inundated with negative comments branding her a “catfish” for “misleading” men in clubs by not disclosing that she’s trans before allowing them to buy her drinks and kiss her.
But the 20-year-old insists that it wouldn’t be safe to tell every boozed-up bloke that approaches her on nights out that she is transgender.
Tayla, from Bolton, Greater Manchester, said: “I get quite a bit of male attention on nights out but I don’t go out to seek that out, I just go out to have fun.
“If someone approaches me in a club scenario when everyone’s drunk, and I know not all men are okay with it, I don’t feel like it’s safe for me to expose everything about my life.
“As long as it’s nothing sexual I feel like it’s none of their business.
“If someone is to kiss me then I don’t say anything unless I feel comfortable telling them. I don’t think that’s too far and I don’t see it as assault at all, people take it the wrong way.”
She added that if there was “anything sexual or serious” planned, such as a date, then she would choose to tell them.
Tayla says she realised she was trans around the age of 13 and that social media gave her more insight into the trans community and ultimately helped her to understand herself.
After keeping it to herself until she left school, she finally came out at 16 and visited her GP, who referred her to a specialist gender clinic.
She then began transitioning with hormone replacement therapy and experimenting with makeup, hair and outfits.
Now she says she often gets men approaching her on nights out trying to chat her up.
But many infuriated commenters slammed her actions as “deceitful” and some even said it should be “illegal” or warned that it “could end badly” if someone found out afterwards.
One commenter said: “It is most certainly their business, you are taking their choice away.”
Another said: “This should be illegal.”
Whereas others came out in support of Tayla, saying it’s no one’s business but hers before things get intimate and agreeing that she’s right to protect her own safety.
One said: “People acting like you should have it written on your forehead. As long as you tell them before engaging in sexual activity it’s not anyone’s business.”
Another said: “It’s unnecessary [because] she’ll most likely never see them again and honestly just dangerous.”
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Tayla has spent a whopping £30,000 on procedures to transition into a more feminine look, including facial feminisation surgery last year.
This involved seven procedures to her face – a rhinoplasty, chin augmentation, forehead reconstruction, brow bone shave and lift, hairline lowering and implants under her eyes.
She has also had lip and cheek filler and wears pricey £850 extensions as part of her look.
The social worker says these procedures have helped her transition and gain social acceptance as a woman but admits that dating remains “complicated”.
“It’s there in my Tinder bio for them to read so they can make their opinions and decisions based on that information.
Tayla said: “Some people match me and then unmatch me without saying anything. Some people can be a bit insensitive or some people are absolutely fine with it and just talk to me normally.”